I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
