I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
