She said her name was "party"
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
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