I only kidnapped one of them. chill
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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