Hello Stephanie, you need to come pick me up at Par Blvrd correctional facility and bring $750-$1000 for bail. I just got a DUI. Thank you.
What!?!?! How are you txting?!
Because this is Officer Reynolds, and I just arrested your boyfriend.
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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