If you die in college, do you die in real life?
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
wow bdsm is so cute
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
