I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Randomize
