I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
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