You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
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