This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize