smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Found your dick twin last night
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize