Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Randomize
