He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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