im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize