Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize
