i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize