): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
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