so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
