This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Randomize
