Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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