Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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