Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
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