You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
