i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Randomize
