do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The uberlube is also flammable
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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