do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
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