oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
