Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize