Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
