how can u be prego again
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
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