They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
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