if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
