I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
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