i barfeds in our rink
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Randomize
