We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
Randomize
