You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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