Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize