We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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