yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
Randomize
