Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
whose parrot is this?
40s are totally the cure
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
