yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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