Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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