walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
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please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
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