I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Randomize
