How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Randomize
