normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Randomize
