Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
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