as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
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