If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize