The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
We're too hungover to prance.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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